This can be summed up with one simple and inspired anecdote, told by the sponsee of a friend of mine.
“When I tell my therapist about something that pisses me off, he says, ‘Yes I can understand why that would make you angry.’ When I tell my sponsor about something that pisses me off, he says, ‘What was your wrong in the situation? Don’t focus on others, focus on yourself.'”
Beautiful. Clearly God was speaking through this guy, though I’m sure it was lost on everybody else in the meeting.
God, please teach us not to ask others for answers but to find them ourselves, to focus not on others but rather ourselves, and to blame not others but rather ourselves…