My incredible girlfriend often texts me various forms of inspiration to get me to write. One of her favorite sources is the addict’s diary (which is, to put it lightly, brutal), as she has a plethora of asinine FB posts at her fingertips. I’m not sure if it’s the poor quality of the writing, the infantile attention-seeking or the new-age idiocy, but regardless, I used to act like a loud, cocky, smug, liberal intellectual and it is not only a mental disorder but it is truly nauseating. Getting off on attention and self-seeking this way is exactly the sort of hubris that brings addicts down.
Why is our sober condition, which billions of other people have, something that warrants social recognition? How about we instead recognize the millions of people who didn’t waste God knows how many years of their lives turning themselves into useless drug addicts and destroying everything around them? Does anyone see how ridiculous and narcissistic this is? Gimme a break.
To recover is to finally get over ourselves. To recover is to finally stop incessantly focusing on ME and my feelings, thoughts, identity, ambition, life, etc. To recover, we must rid ourselves of this self-obsession. We must let go of the need to be seen by others, to be recognized by others and praised by others. To recover is to finally grow the fuck up and assume our natural position as an adult who just quietly does his or work, who thinks about others from time to time, who often puts himself second before his family, spouse and children. To recover we are to shed the adolescent narcissism that cripples us and warps our minds. Trust me, it is extremely unattractive. Nobody is looking at us. Nobody cares. Nobody should be laying out the red carpet for us. All of the people in our lives would really just prefer that we shut the fuck up, get over ourselves, move on with it, get to work, and just start acting like a normal, responsible, humble adult.