Narcissism is rampant in America today, and in particular, infantile narcissism has exploded with the advent of “woke” culture, which is by every measure the epitome of ignorance and juvenile stupidity. And you thought narcissism was limited to the alcoholic or the drug addict. That said, the addict is a terrific microcosm of America today, as he displays the worst and most extreme end of childish behavior. Carrying narcissism into recovery, for instance, is the greatest telltale sign the addict has accomplished nothing in treatment. Drying out for a few weeks in detox and/or rehab is less than a percent of the work necessary to recovery, change into a better person and alter the course of a life. And truthfully, the person we are and our spiritual condition is the crux of the problem.
Once in a while my grandfather calls regarding one of my alcoholic cousins. He will periodically dry out for a few days and make some phone calls to display his great clarity and well being. And every time my grandfather rings me up to tell my how well my cousin sounds, I have to explain the same concept. There is no in-between. We are either completely okay or not at all. When a person is insane and absent a conscience, physical sobriety alone accomplishes nothing. Physical sobriety is simply a clinical requirement before embarking on a lifetime of spiritual and moral action. And so it is all or nothing with us. We are either completely insane or we have become sane. The sane person does not relapse, is under no threat to relapse, and does not continue to behave like a pathetic addict. The good news is that the condition of insanity of many addicts is, or can be, temporary. That is, his loss of willpower and insanity can be restored. However, for that to occur, he or she MUST be capable of self-honesty, and sadly, those who are not capable will not and cannot get better. Remember that. They are hopeless. They are psychopaths. But even those with grave mental and emotional maladies can recover completely if they can become honest with themselves.
So if your addict or your alcoholic returns from rehab and continues to behave like a child, he or she is the exact same person as when they left. If they are consumed by their needs and their feelings, they are no better at all. If they are consumed by their former lives, they are no better. If they continue to whine and complain about this person and that person, they are no better. If they continue to blame everyone and everything that they falsely think makes them suffer and use and drink, they are no better. If they continue to hold onto their selfishness, they are no better. If they continue to scheme and design and manipulate and control the world and others around them, they are no better. If they continue to react and become defensive, proud and critical, they are no better. If they continue to think about themselves and their lives 24/7, they are still completely insane.
Any addict who meets this description has done nothing while away in treatment, if you dare to even call it that now. Conversely, an addict or alcoholic who has recovered has been touched. He or she has, by their effort and by the power of God, induced a profound psychic change. He or she has had a spiritual experience, and following this experience, the entirety of negative, delusional, selfish and destructive attitudes, notions, beliefs and patterns of behaving and reacting have been cast aside and replaced with a new set based on spiritual principles and God. You would know with haste if your addict was truly okay. He would be glowing with Spirit. His face, body and posture would look different. His eyes would look grounded, calm and sane. A fire has been lit inside the recovered individual and by his words and actions, it would be unmistakable. He no longer reacts like a selfish child. He no longer whines and complains and blames the world. He is positive and confident and reaches out to help his family, his friends, and anyone else in need.
Sadly, rehabs today have become progressive gulags. The addict is poisoned with victimhood and disease model propaganda. He is coddled beyond belief and is lied to about the truth of personal responsibility and accountability. Remember this: We make ourselves into who and what we have become. Nothing external causes us to drink, use, lie, steal, manipulate, abuse, whine, complain and fail. Nothing external causes our addiction and depression. We alone are to blame for our lives. Do not let evil lies infect you or your addict. Tell the addict the truth. Tell them what they have done and who they have become. And for the love of God, do not blame yourself for the addiction of another. This is my next book, by the way. It will be addressed to the millions of parents, spouses and families who falsely blame themselves for the addiction of a loved one. It will cut through the lies of the delusional and ignorant left and will hopefully put an end to the false belief that addiction has any other cause but ourselves and our actions. It will also tell the truth about what lies underneath addiction and why the only solution is to change the person we have become through rigorous and consistent moral action.
God, please teach us to live by Your principles…